I bring forth writing to the table. It’s an act of creation…something wasn’t there, and then I ticka-tacka on the keyboard a bit and wall-ah! A novel!
Um…actually, it’s more like I get lost in the foxholes of my mind, chewing mindlessly on the ends of my own hair, don’t eat shower talk or sleep, occasionally laugh maniacally to myself, occasionally sob endlessly curled up in my office chair…surviving for days on jalapeno Cheetos and the food I snatch from my kids as they walk by…
Okay. hehe. It’s not quite that bad.
But still…writing. Not easy. But it’s not all that hard, either. It’s fun. I like it. So I do it.
All that to say…it’ll never be the best thing I’ve done.
No, that happened 5 yrs ago on November 3rd.
See that kid? She wouldn’t be here if not for me. I had the joy and the agony of bringing her forth into the world.
And guess what? She’s one million times better than anything else I could ever produce.
So I have this sense of done-ness. This sense of completion. I’ve already taken part in the most amazing creation experiences of my life…and now I can just Rock and Roll.
So when I think about my writing, I feel like the pressure’s off. I’ve already done the coolest thing I’ll ever do. So I can just sit back and enjoy myself now.
I used to think it’d be great to be “the best” as something. That I should be “the best” fantasy author, or “the best” basketball player, or “the best” at making Ramen noodles with meatballs and celery. But now, now…I’ve realized that I don’t want to be the best anymore. I’ve stopped striving for it and now I just want to BE.
That little poem just came outta nowhere. You can have it.
But anyways, I hope all y’all get a sense of release with your art. You don’t have to be the best, you should just tell your story. Although I know the power of a good story, I still know that it can’t change my life like my husband and children do. So that’s why I put them first. And…I was just kidding up there about stealing their food as they walked by. I would never do that.
Unless it was Jalapeno Cheetos.
(and just because I’m a MOM I’m going to post baby pictures of my two other kids, Lilia and Darius).
Did parenthood change your view of life accomplishments?
Do you feel a sense of release over your art?